June 08, 2005
Ohana means no Dork left behind
I'm just back from Oahu. Hawaii is a great place. You can be a Dork and dress like a tourist and everyone is happy to see you.
So how do you spot a Dork (like ME) in Hawaii? Here are your 5 clues.
1. The Dork (of euro-mutt descent) is the only one without either a "spray on" or natural tan. Just pale skin covered in SPF 45 UVA/UVB sunscreen.
2. Tennis shoes on the beach. A dead giveaway.
3. Everyone else is wearing ball caps. The Dork is in a panama hat or a wide brimmed straw hat.
4. The Dork is online answering e-mail every day. Hey Dork girl! Get a life and go snorkeling or something!
5. Camera around neck, shorts, an aloha shirt, and a puka shell necklace (or lei.) Takes pictures of everything (including the slug on the ground in the world's largest maze at the Dole Pineapple Plantation.)
Bonus Clue: the Dork is the one who walks right into the security scanner at Hilo Hattie's because she isn't looking where she's going :-)
Posted by Sheryl at 10:44 AM | Comments (0)
May 24, 2005
Dork in the City...
It's only fair that since I plan to discuss my favorite Dorks, and what qualifies them for inclusion on that list, that I tell a story on myself first. After all, I believe that it takes one to appreciate one.
So here we go. Picture Los Angeles circa 1998. I was in LA pretty frequently attending a trade shows. At the Western Cable show there were ample opportunities to make a Dork of myself. Let's see, I got my picture taken with a Robin Williams look alike, got autographs from several celebrities, including Matt Frewer ("Max Headroom", Sherlock Holmes,) Jules Asner from Entertainment Tonight, and a photo with Randolph Mantooth ("Emergency!") what a nice guy! I collected bags full of info to take home, and of course, a few logo trinkets for family and friends. On a scale of 1 to 10, that probably put me at about a 3 or 4 (low to mid grade Dork.)
But that wasn't what clinched my Dork title.
There was that trade show where my buddies from PBS and I were hanging out at one of the evening social gatherings, and a band was playing all kinds of really great and danceable stuff. Well, my friends nagged, prodded, and otherwise goaded me into hitting the dance floor with a guy from PBS named "Atilla." What were his parents thinking?? I was afraid to ask his last name. So here's Atilla, who's an exceptional ballroom dancer, trying to teach me how to rumba.
Now, being that I'm a musician, I know how to PLAY music. Dancing is another thing altogether. I didn't have the benefit of a great "teach yourself how to dance" video, like Napoleon Dynamite did, to prepare me. Quick, let me hide behind a guitar, PLEASE. After crashing into Atilla a few times, I did eventually get the hang of it. OK, so public dance lessons from a guy named Atilla at a trade show with your colleagues, that's got to be at least a 6 on the Dork scale.
But what really put me on the Dorkosphere, so to speak, happened during an interactive TV trade show. Of course, Microsoft was trying to establish themselves as the major player in the ITV space and so they threw a lavish invitation only party one evening during the show. It was complete with Cirque style dancer/acrobats, and an oxygen bar. My colleague Jud got tickets to the event and was kind enough to give me one. Jud knows everyone...you've heard of the 6 degrees of Kevin Bacon? Hey, that's nothing compared to the 3 degrees of Jud. Anyway, I met Jud at the event, and as we started to go in there was a tall, cool, GQ looking guy near the entrance who extended his hand to me.
I reached out my hand, grabbed his and shook it. I smiled at him and said something about what a beautiful evening it was, told him my name and said it was a pleasure to meet him. All of his GQ cool disappeared and he stumbled for words like a schoolboy caught daydreaming. My friend, Jud, was doubled over chuckling. When GQ guy got his cool back he managed to ask me for my ticket.
Sheryl scores a 22 on the Dorkmeter of 1 to 10. That turnip truck over there? Yeah, that's my ride.
Posted by Sheryl at 11:03 PM | Comments (0)